Condo Living

My brother/biz partner and I own some rental properties, one of which is a condo in north Oceanside near the mission. I had put in a request for a rebuilding and remodeling of my patio cover with the architecture committee, assuming it was no big deal and I'd be approved.

I assumed wrong.

Tonight was the review of the application at the every-other-month association meeting. I was informed that my proposal to replace the large timber beam and cover the frame with 2x2s was not acceptable because the 2x2s mean that when the building was painted next the association would spend more than my fair share of paint on the wood since they (according to them) own that structure.

Which stunned the hell out of me since that part of the building is in my fenced off "backyard."

BUT

They offered a compromise. They would remove the entire wooden structure for free. We would be allowed to put an umbrella in the table or we could install a canvas awning over the slider door. So, OK, I guess we'll remove the entire thing, because I can't have the beam in place like that since it is dry-rotted. "Oh, it's our liability" I was told but I know how that goes.

But then the next order of business was the landscaping. Another couple was there (they were Russian, this is important); they were unhappy with the state of their landscaping and wanted to know what the association was going to do about it. The answer was "nothing." The place ERUPTED with people yelling at each other and saying things like "I won't shut up!" "One person at a time" and the phrase I was waiting for, "I grew up in Soviet Union, I demand democracy!"

He even threw in a reference to World War II and defeating Hitler.

Awesome, simply fucking awesome.

After everyone calmed down the 80 year old grumpy Grandpa president wanted to end the meeting but before anyone could move it or second it I jumped in and asked if that was acceptable under Roberts' and was told it was, but I stated that I thought we should finish the agenda since we were all here.

So, we did.

After the meeting ended I told the Russians to wait for me outside because I wanted to talk to them. They turned out to be very nice people and they seemed just as embarrassed about what happened as everyone else should be. I showed them my place and they showed me theirs; they have done a lot of beautiful work on the interior in the few short months they've been there. We commiserated about the state of the complex and they understood the situation a little better.

God am I glad I live in an HOA-free house.